Sexless Marriage Divorce Rate
Like it or not, sex is an important part of marriage. The lack of sex can lead to the withdrawal of affection, and it can cause one or both partners to stray. Living in a sexless marriage is a difficult and painful thing to do for everyone, being rejected by the person who once your lover and partner is not only frustrating but humiliating, and a major blow to self-esteem made worse coming from your husband. A sexless marriage is not an uncommon thing, however with an estimated 18% of marriages becoming passionless and making love less than ten times per year when you also look at the 50% divorce rate we see some serious problems that could be linked. The Sexless Marriage Can:
- Leave you feeling inconsolably lonely.
- Reduce your confidence and self-esteem to zero.
- Leave you feeling not in control or confused of the situation.
- Cause depression which may lead to suicidal tendencies.
Causes Of Sexless Marriage
The causes of your sexless marriage could be one of many things, but you may want to start with looking at one of these three possibilities: stress, an affair, or a boring routine.
If stress is the cause of lack of sex in your marriage, then you may want to look at where the stress is coming from. Is it coming from work? Maybe a different job is in order. Is it coming from your financial situation? You should sit down with your partner and get a plan together to make things on the money front better. Is it being caused by your lack of sex? Discuss with your spouse why you are not having sex, this could be as easy as making time to have fun in the sack. Just taking the time to discuss the problem could afford you a solution.
2. Reduction in sex drive.
This is rare, but it does happen. Either the man or the woman suffers some physical reduction is sex drive. This can often be treated medically. Again, this is very rare.
3. Lack of sexual attraction
In certain cases, lack of sexual attraction causes sexless relationship and marriages. This happens when one of the partner lets herself (or himself) go. Personal grooming, lack of working out or Gaining weight may lead to a decrease in sexual attraction and frequency of intercourse, but this is usually just an excuse because there are millions of overweight people who enjoy a fulfilling and healthy sex life. The real reason is usually much deeper.
4. An Affair.
When your partner or you is having an affair, it could be real ugly. The fling in your lives is the latest and greatest thing; it will be extremely difficult to compete with that. Even if the affair is ended, how can you trust your partner again to open yourself up and start having intercourse? In this case, look back and see what may have caused the affair in the first place. Was it lack of sex? Then look to see what caused that. Go through this process with your spouse to get the most bang for your buck.
5. Lack of variety.
In the bedroom, you and your spouse go through the same motions every time you are making love. If this is what your life in the bedroom has become, then chances are your life outside of the bedroom is the same. Try thinking of ways that you can spend some time with your husband or wife doing things you have never done before. It does not have to be fancy, just something different. If you can surprise them without any suspicion, the change-up may be even better. Just making some unexpected changes in your daily routine could bring some spark back to your sex life.
More reasons for a sexless marriage:
- Your partner may have become abusive or violent towards you.
- One of you may have become lazy and begun to ignore your tasks around the house.
- You may not find your partner physically attractive to you or vice versa.
- Your feelings for him or her may have changed and one of you seems less emotionally attached.
- There is a lack of communication, being constantly overlooked or ignored.
- There may be lies involved which have severed the trust involved in a marriage.
How to Fix Sexless Marriage
If you fail to address the issues which caused the sexless marriage in the first place, then you are looking for very lonely and long relationship which will inevitably lead to some serious counseling and most probably divorce. When you have some time and are willing to discuss the issues and work through it together, you will be able to save and bring the love your marriage. It may seem like a lot of work at times, but if you truly love each other, then this will be well worth the effort. The following are tips on how to fix a sexless marriage:
1. Go To a Marriage Counseling.
In marriage counseling, you will be taught how to handle your problems and deal with it. You will also learn how to make up for the lost time and teach you techniques to bring back the loving again. Seeking for a professional help can benefit your relationship a lot.
2. Have a Serious Talk.
Do you know the reason what went wrong why most likely not having sex with your partner anymore? I’m sure there are a lot of questions on your mind that needs to be answered. You should also try everything that you can to enable you to talk with your spouse about important matters you need to discuss. Sitting down and being able to discuss things can help fix your failing relationship.
Take time each day to reconnect. Ask each other, “What do you need from me today,” and mean it. Whether it helps with the kids or a simple hug, understand what your partner needs from you.
Take time for yourself. This is easier said than done I realize, but it is of the utmost importance when fixing a relationship. You can’t always be focusing on another person. At some point, the needs you have to be satisfied. I’m not speaking sexually of course. That will come with time. I’m saying if you feel you need to get your hair done, do it. If you want to start out exercising to it. Give yourself and your partner the time necessary to do the little things that make us all feel good about ourselves.
5. Don’t give in, don’t give up.
This one is tough. It is time to stop avoiding the situation. Admit there is a problem and begin to deal with it. Just don’t do it during connecting time. That time is perfect for emotional re-connection. This time is that you can deal with issues also to speak to be truthful no matter how hard it hurts. And don’t give up on this one. Avoiding the issue obviously has not been working!
6. Date Night.
When things get a little better set aside a night every week (or every other week depending on budgets) to go out and act like adults. Now that you are conversing again, hopefully, you can learn to fix your sexless marriage by adding in slightly romance. It may not feel romantic at first. In fact it may feel unusually awkward at first, but keep at it.
7. Hang Out and Have Fun.
Were you able to go out last week and spend some alone time together? Do you want to enjoy and spend some quality time with your spouse and constitute with everything? Then really time so that you can ask your partner out on a romantic date. You deserve to hang out and have fun together. This will bring back the lost spark, and you will surely have the excitement in the bedroom once again.
There are some marriages and relationship that fight through this problem and find a solution, though, and others do not and end up miserable or in divorce. Getting divorced because of a sexless marriage is the easy way out, you are better than this. Unless there is violence or an affair involved you should be able to have your problems turned around in less time than you think if you are having problems then read more about sexless marriages and how they can be repaired, but only when both people address the root of the problem. This is not an issue which will just go away by itself; it needs to be worked on together. If your partner refuses to discuss the problem, start by reminding them of how good things used to be. Sometimes the only solution to a sexless marriage is divorce. In case you decide to settle for a divorce ensure that you hire the best divorce attorney to help you with your sexless marriage divorce.